on my mind. . .

-first day of school mom jitters. anticipation mixed with a little dread. not sure if i am ready to get back into the grind and routine that is day after day, but at the same time ready for some constancy to our days. crossing all my fingers and toes that greta has a great first day at her new school.

-amazed at gunnar. despite getting probably his last pick for a homeroom teacher, he has a positive attitude and hasn’t complained once. hoping that he is blessed in a million other ways for being such a brave boy.

-what am i going to do with all of these dozens of apples and pears we picked today?

-dreaming up our mid morning smoothie for tomorrow using some of the fresh picked raspberries.

-change. i don’t know what but something is calling for change. not sure if growing my bangs out will suffice the kind of change i feel in the air. 🙂

-grateful for my husband who opted to spend the day and evening with us instead of go to the first USC game of the season. that right there is true love. i think he enjoyed his decision though. exhaustion and full bellies is always a sign of a good day.

-i want a horse.

-the need to let go. coming to terms with a balance that i probably can’t achieve. either being a good mother and a bad housewife or a good housewife and a bad mother seems my only choices.


4 thoughts on “on my mind. . .

  1. Greta will do great, but I’ll be a little nervous for them all as well-I always remember the first day of school jitters……bring some apples by, Romeo would luv some Zia……

  2. Sorry for the first day stress 😦 I know it doesn’t feel like it now but tomorrow will be great. Gunnar will be a stronger and more wonderful student for the experience I know it.

  3. I don’t know if you’ll see this as I’m a bit behind on your blog. Your grandma (my mom 🙂 gave me a magnet that reads “trying to do housework when your kids are little is like trying to shovel snow when it is snowing” or something to that affect. Point is, don’t try. You will never look back and wish your house was cleaner, but if you don’t spend the time with your precious kids, who are changing every second, you WILL look back and wish you spent more time with them. Keep doing what you’re doing, Deborah. You are the BEST mother :)Love you, Tracie

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